So I think by now we've all seen some of the more ridiculous Obama related cashing-in-on-a-new-president-merch stuff such as The Coin, The Plate, The Water Bottle, and of course The Dildo.
Although I find the dildo the only one to have an actual purpose, let me just say one thing about all this merchandise. Most of these are just to rip you off (the coin, plate... to a point, the dildo), and all of them go towards other people not related to the DNC/Obama's campaign (except for the water bottle).
However, I have found something far better than ANY of the above (because, seriously, why get an Obama dildo, there are FAR better sex toys out there). Something that's so much more artistic than adapting a face to be put on a dildo or plate. Something far more imaginative than any of these.
My fellow Americans (and international readers); allow me to present to you, my latest find.
I bring you....
The Obama Action Figure™!
I do not know the specifics, as I cannot read Japanese. But I assure you there is nothing quite like the pictures you're about to see.
Click any picture to see the full size, meanwhile I'll post captions of what I think each picture is saying about The Obama Action Figure™!
The Obama Action Figure™ comes with Bad-Ass American Flag * the symbol of Pride* with Pointy spike of Justice and base of TRUTH, a stool for giving presidential Addresses, TWO different color ties to show support for the RED and BLUE states, rope of Hope (it's gold, therefore made of HOPE), Microphone for ENHANCING ACOUSTICS, and MANY DIFFERENT HANDS!!!!
Looking better than your sister's Ken Doll in a suit and tie, The President Obama Action Figure™ will help YOU protect your country from The Forces of EVIL!
President Obama's™ shoes are Faux leather for the Vegan Crowd, but also Strong enough to kick some Corperate ASS!
President Obama™ takes all issues seriously. This is a Serious Obama™, this is serious face.
USA©! USA©! USA©! USA©! USA©!!!
After a hard day fighting for truth and justice and regulation, Obama™ needs to relax and take it east by striking an awesome pose.
Sometimes President Obama™ needs to have fun with his microphone and cut loose with some karoke; just be careful, because if it's country music you make him sing....
you'll need the secret service to protect YOU from President Obama™!
President Obama™ doesn't need the Army! He's can be all he can be without the Army!
President Obama™ is well aware of the danger the Zombie horde presents; He always has his Primary Weapon...
and his secondary!
"Only a master of evil, Cheney."
Not even The Dark Side of the Force can tempt Obama-Wan Baraki™.
Thank you Cleveland! You're a Wonderful Audience! Good Night!
Looking better than your sister's Ken Doll in a suit and tie, The President Obama Action Figure™ will help YOU protect your country from The Forces of EVIL!
President Obama's™ shoes are Faux leather for the Vegan Crowd, but also Strong enough to kick some Corperate ASS!
President Obama™ takes all issues seriously. This is a Serious Obama™, this is serious face.
USA©! USA©! USA©! USA©! USA©!!!
After a hard day fighting for truth and justice and regulation, Obama™ needs to relax and take it east by striking an awesome pose.
Sometimes President Obama™ needs to have fun with his microphone and cut loose with some karoke; just be careful, because if it's country music you make him sing....
you'll need the secret service to protect YOU from President Obama™!
President Obama™ doesn't need the Army! He's can be all he can be without the Army!
President Obama™ is well aware of the danger the Zombie horde presents; He always has his Primary Weapon...
and his secondary!
"Only a master of evil, Cheney."Not even The Dark Side of the Force can tempt Obama-Wan Baraki™.
Thank you Cleveland! You're a Wonderful Audience! Good Night!
That is one of the funniest things I have seen in months! Thanks!
ReplyDeleteI particularly like the Obama vs Darth Vader one.
I myself am rather interested by this Obama dildo. More info on that to come I hope :-)
ReplyDelete"Thank you Cleveland!" Hahaha! Okay, we know now what his next job should be.
ReplyDeleteNo interchangeable smiley Obabma head? Bummer.
OH my god, that's fantastic. You know, I actually thought it was a pretty, y'know, legitimate thing, up to a point, until they got to the karaoke, and the guns, and the swords.. ah, those beautiful Japanese, I'll be seeing them soon
ReplyDelete*Also, disappointed they don't have a shaka hand
Corina: Obama v. Vader is an interpretation of Bill O's pundit claims versus Obama's cool Jedi-like reaction to it. "if you strike me down, i'll become more powerful than you could ever imagine."
ReplyDeleteAmber: Click the link. They are like 40 bucks. Although, I don't want the idea of the Obama Dildo in anyone. What you do with the President is your own business.
Ann: Yeah, but the 'speaking head' is kinda cool. I like the attention to detail with the little mole and hairline.
Sophie: I wouldn't doubt if it was a real product; the guns and lightsabers are probably just universally exchangeable with the hand size. Hope you have fun in Japan!
I rely on your blog to keep me informed of all that is ridiculous in this world...and it has not failed me yet :)
ReplyDelete~Bethany
Awesome post, son!
ReplyDeleteHillarious...genious. I want one!! I too am quite fond of the Obama/Vader pic.
ReplyDelete