(just so i don't get sued, this entire post is in sarcasm)
Seriously, the old man who owns (through a giant media company) myspace can rim my asshole nice and slow.
In case you didn't know myspace (dot) com is full of BadHair, pedophiles, shitty bands, tools,and is one of the top social networking sites. Facebook recently has taken myspace's throne as shittest largest social networking site. Facebook has it's disadvantages, but in general doesn't have the spam (other than fucking app requests) that seems to permeate through myspace's teen angst ridden pores. Seriously, I delete spam messages and friend requests on average of twice a day. My very unused hotmail account doesnt get that much spam on average. And I've signed up for PORN using that address!
So why all the ire, and venom and hate, you ask? Let's take a look.... That's right! Mysack has declaired my BLOG a PHISHING SCAM! This blog is a motherfucking phishing scam! I want your passwords and your money! Muhahahaha!
I'm active, to a point, on a few different social networking sites; and if you look hard enough, you can find me.
I don't want to friend Tawney and Sheenah, I don't need to read chain letters in bullitens, I don't want my timetobewasted. I like my friends, I like silly surveys, I like being in the loop. But I'm sick of the bullshit. First from the majority of its users, now from the site itself.
My message for Rupert and the idiots working for myspace tag my blog as phishing spam... let me let George Carlin sum up my feelings.
I don't have pet peeves, I have major psychotic fucking hatreds, okay?
Recently over a friend's house I was having a grand old time untill someone mentioned President-Elect Barack Obama was going to teach kindergarteners sex education in schools. This was coming from an 18 year-old expectant mother who couldn't shut up about her preggers belly. I shook my head, and said "That isn't what he said. " I got a condescending smirk as she was walking out the door.
Yesterday, my wonderful possible future father-in-law informed me that the United States Supreme Court will now be debating to hear a suit brought against our President Elect for not being born in the US or not having Legal Citizen status.
Today, I got an earfull from some of Jen's coworkers on how Obama is a horrible person because he's a smoker.
I am incredibly sick and tired of hearing these rumors of Obama persist. Obama is a legal US citizen. If a person is born on US soil, he is a citizen. He wasn't born in Kenya, yes his father was a citizen of the UK and Kenya, his mother was from Kansas, he was born in Hawaii. Which incase you haven't noticed, is a state.
'It's the wallet that says 'Bad MotherFucker'
Oh and evidently is a horrible thing to have a president who smokes. This if you ask me, is much better than having an administration who lied to get 4,306 (confirmed dead, there are 3 more who have not been confirmed by our DoD) of our country's people killed in a war we caused. This administration is also responsible for removing habeas corpus if one is labeled a 'Terrorist,' and may not 'torture' you, but may 'redefine what torture is'.
Lets put this into perspective.
Smoking, while unpleasant and kinda gross, endangers mostly endangers the person smoking, and if exposed to chronic consistent tobacco smoke, others around him.
Look, I am not asking you to love Barack Obama. I don't care what you think about the man, in terms of policy or his private life. I do care that people are spreading lies, untruths and generally being narrow minded because he is young, black and our President Elect.
FactCheck.org a non partisan website, to figure out what is true and what is false. There is enough bullshit out there in the world. So do a favor and stop spewing it. I'm sick and tired of having to correct people. You have an opinion; fine. You want to be ignorant of the facts, spew information that you know is false; go join our mass media. But if you want to engage me in political or social debate, or make mention of something you only heard, and have not actively looked up if it is true or not, you need to shut the hell up, listen to people who HAVE done research, and educate yourself.
TV, you had a GREATgood medocre run. I am going to give you Pros and Cons in various categories then decide if you're worth having around, TV.
1. Technology Thanks to TV, we do have higher definition, remotes, portable movie players, Video on Demand, HDMI, and various ways of pirating TV and Movies. Howerver, with highdefinition comes great responcibilities. Who here has a Blu-ray Disc burner? Who has a HDMI ready computer monitor? Who really wants porn in high-def? For me, the answers are no, sort of, and Oh Dear Sweet Buddah NO!
2. Programming With the exception of some brilliant programs, TV in the past 10, no 20 years have been shit. America loves (according to the Neilson Raitings) American Idol (2005-2008), CSI (2003-04), Friends (2002), Survivor (2001) and Who Wants to be A Millionaire (2000). So for half of the current decade we are living in, we've spend time watching idiots on gameshows trying to win either a million dollars(Survivor, Millionare, Idol), cars (Survivor, Idol) or a recording contract/souless existance (American Idol).
11 of the top 20 prime time telecasts from 1964-present have been sporting events. The only really redeaming quality of that list is that the series finale of MASH tops the list and the finale of Roots is at number 3.
So we watch reality TV and sports, programming in my opinion, that makes us docile and complacent, and does not teach us anything. Even the most basic sitcom has the basic premise of Good v. Bad or Idocy v. Intellegence. Sometimes they get the message right (M*A*S*H), sometimes they get it wrong (Seinfeld), sometimes they just leave us confused (LOST).
Programming on the History, Discovery, Investigation and A&E have much more intellegent programming than most of the other channels. Discovery Channel has MythBusters; FOX has Family Guy, need I say more
3. Storytelling
In case you haven't noticed, TV isn't about this anymore, it's about getting you to BUY BUY BUY shit that you do not need. Average half hour programs are actually 22 minuits, to allow for 8 minutes of commercials. Over the course of 10 hours, American viewers will see approximately 3 hours of advertisements. They are now thinking of using embedded ads to annoy people like me. Kind of like popup adds, or the annoying topper bars on old geocities webpages.
4. News General Electric owns NBC, MSNBC, CNBC and Court TV. Westinghouse is partners with CBS including 48 Hours and 60 Minutes. Newscorp owns FOX and it's subsidearies.
Time Warner owns CNN. Disney owns ABC.
We have no real news any more, Edward R. Murrow would be ashamed.
I say let's leave TV for now, watch and watch it all you want people. I'll continue to remain behind the times, and pirate the shows I like. And I'll gladly get my news from the internets.
2. l33tsp33k and or CaPaTaLiZiNg RandOM LETTErS
Okay, unless you are writing in a code (house of leaves), lolspeek and the aboved mentioned typography issues piss me the fuck off. I mean, internet culture is amusing to a degree, and I do use it, mostly in an ironic or sarcastic sense. Hell, this WebLog (figure it out kids) is an accidental reference to internet culture, and since I am posting this in them thar series of tubes I feel that I have a right to mock the idocy of the internet from time to time.
Lolcode, a programing language that mimics the speech patterns of captioned felines. An example follows.
HAI
CAN HAS STDIO?
PLZ OPEN FILE "LOLCATS.TXT"?
AWSUM THX
VISIBLE FILE
O NOES
INVISIBLE "ERROR!"
KTHXBYE
What the fuck, guys? Does this really DO anything? What are you trying to acomplish
beside amusing me for 20 seconds?
3.Blogger.com
Okay, this is biting the hand that feeds you, but why the fuck did this post decide to not connect to
blogger.com, then refuckingformat the post like 3 times. shit was going out of the edges, and I couldn't read
what i typed origionaly.
EDIT: this is still fucked up in my little blogger.com window, text overlapping picture of the internets
is all covered in text.... It pissed me off that all of this shit looks like crap on the entry page, and then
crap on the page because somehow my html formatting got royaly fucked in the ass with a big rubber
dildo with a mickymouse head on the end...
EDIT 2: trying to get this reformatted is pissing me off more and more. so, it's going up as is. eat my shit blogger.com
1. Axl Rose and Guns 'n' Roses So I take it we all know that Axl Rose is releasing the 15+ years in the making album Chinese Democracy. Har har, cute name because it's an oxymoron. And psudo-ironic.
I enjoy old GnR, Lies and Appetite were both solidly good recordings, and to me, bring back a nostalgia of childhood/early teenage years when I really got into 'Rock'.
But if you are like me, you've grown sick of the hype surrounding this upcoming release. Axl is the only origional member from GNR to appear on the album, so why not call it a solo album or something else. Dizzy Reed joined GnR when it was at it's peak, and for touring reasons. He did appear on UYI 1&2, and is the only tie that Rose has with the peak the band experienced in the early 1990's.
I expect this album to be top of the charts the week it's released. A lot of fans remember GnR, and will buy anything that has it's name on it. And they have made a lot more fans since they've been inactive since 1993-4. I don't deny that this is fricking awesome, because I'll get a free Dr. Pepper, but it's just a damn album. There will be ups, and there will be downs; prepare to be disappointed, GnR fans.
2. People Magazine: Hugh Jackman I don't know; maybe I'm a little little fucked up in the head, but Hugh Jackman, right? Wolverine-Hugh Jackman? Van Helsing-Hugh Jackman?
3. George Lucas Thank you George Lucas for raping my childhood once again. First it was Star Wars, which you started raping back in 1999 with making The Force be about fucking microbiology! I like microbio, it's cool and interesting, but little parasitic bacterium cannot make you be able to choke someone with your mind! Strike 1.
Then, I saw a trailer of EP 2: ATTACK OF THE CONES! (worst subtitle in the history of film making; even more so than Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky). Then I saw the movie.
Let me spell this out for you George... Y-o-d-a- -w-a-s- -a- -p-u-p-p-e-t-! And it was fucking awesome! You had him all CGI floating around on a fucking wok pan, and generally raping one of the saddest deaths I ever witnessed in film (when i was 5).
Strike fucking 2.
So onto episode III, the revenge of George's really bad ham fisted comments on politics and giving things really silly names.
Look, man. You started out so good, and you had a wonderful little universe. You had a good story with A New Hope. You had a great story with Empire. Then you had a well rounded conclusion with Jedi (except for the fucking muppets). And, because you wanted to add a personal spa to pamper your aging scrotum, with bubble jets, mineral baths and daily de-wrinkling, you decided to tell more of the story.
There's a reason why Milton's epic poem Paradise Lost is more popular and well known than Paradise Regained.
I'll now briefly list other travesties bestowed upon humanity by you,you hack of a filmmaker. The Clone Wars, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, Willow (fucking hobbit +bible+gulliver's travles ripoff), The Land Before Time (you killed littlefoot's MOM, you fucking bastard; and it has 13 sequels), Howard the Duck, and More American Graffiti. NOT to mention The StarWars Holiday Special (BEA ARTHUR!!!!!)
4. LOST Okay, I watched the first season when it was on, and then due to various reasons, I stopped watching it. Now, I've been re-watching it with Jen, and now progressed to the third season.
J.J. Abrams is a genius. I watched Alias quite often, I liked Cloverfield as a monster movie, and his remake on Star Trek (which I haven't watched since I was a very young child) is looking promising.
You got me hooked, again. And to top it off, not ONLY is there the show, there is the ARG stuff that you seem to do after every season is done/leading up to the next season.
I am a sucker for ARGs. Year Zero, Why So Serious/The Dark Knight, Iris. And I didn't even buy Iris/Halo 3
That's right! Mysack has declaired my BLOG a PHISHING SCAM! This blog is a motherfucking phishing scam! I want your passwords and your money! Muhahahaha!
